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Stupid Animals by Ian Westmoreland
Play And Record would like to stress that no actual animals were harmed in the writing of this song. However, we should point out that due to a technical error, in an earlier draft about 40 eels needlessly bit the dust.
Bird flew into my window pane
He ain’t ever getting up again
Dumbest bird in the whole wide world
Stupid bird
Hog walked onto a railroad track
But he ain’t ever coming back
He’s the dumbest hog in the whole wide world
Stupid hog
CHORUS
You can lead a horse to water
But you can’t make him drink
You can ride him down to Oxford town
But you can’t make him think
A bull sat into a little boat
He was so heavy that it wouldn’t float
Dumbest bull in the whole wide world
Stupid bull
A cow tried to walk on an old tightrope
She was so heavy that it went and broke
Dumbest cow in the whole wide world
Stupid cow
CHORUS
Goat he tried to drive a car
He ain’t ever going to get too far
Dumbest goat in the whole wide world
Stupid goat
And the old hen tried to swim in the sea
She got caught immediately
Ended up as some shark’s tea
Stupid hen
CHORUS
And a bird flew into my window pane
He ain’t ever getting up again
Dumbest bird in the whole wide world
Stupid bird
The dumbest bird in the whole wide world
Stupid bird
Yes he’s the dumbest bird in the whole wide world
Stupid bird
In The Zone by Musical Statues
Locked Inside A Sweetshop by Wattle & Daub
Porridge Puddles by Jake Johnson & Snakely
The Three Headed Duck Song by Bishop Auckland
Flit Flat In The Hat by Ska-Daddle
Hot Shot Billy Boyd by Hoy Booth
Le Go by Kirkole C & The New Coupling Principle
Dark In The Dark by Max Schreck & Saddlebag
The Key by Pie Shop The Sheriff
